Stop Chasing the Labrador

Yesterday was bad, this morning was bad. I started the day with a rejection from a company in London I'd contacted yesterday. I suppose on the bright side, they hadn't wasted any time but I had hoped by some miracle they would set up a meeting with me.

I called my friend Kate today. She went through a bad break-up a couple of years ago and has emerged with words of wisdom on the other side.

After listening to my misery, my voice wobbly with holding back the tears, she finally told me a story. "I used to have a yellow lab and every time I tried to catch him, he ran further and further away from me. It drove me crazy and made me realise I shouldn't have kids. Finally I stopped and thought, "Let the dog come to me, stop chasing the labrador!" And sure enough, the dog came to her." I have no idea if Kate actually had a yellow labrador but it was just what I needed.

I loved the story and the analogy. I wrote (in capital letters) on a post-it note, STOP CHASING THE LABRADOR and stuck it on my monitor at work. Of course this will confuse the hell out of anyone who sees it but it already made me laugh at least once today and when C called me as I was driving back from the dog park, I was able to chat quite happily and silently repeated to myself, "stop chasing the labrador."

Wise Kate also recommended a book, Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. I bought it after work and have enjoyed an evening of reading. I'm on page 96 so far and she's had me laughing out loud a couple of times. Overall though her descriptions of depression and lonliness captured as two men really caught my imagination. How many times I've seen those two loathsome characters. I understood every word she said.

And so today in the end has not been too bad. I asked for a week off work (yet to be approved) and tomorrow I am going to the ballet. Small steps but good ones and as long as I remember my mantra "What would Catherine Deneuve do?" Then everything should be ok.

Good night.
Wedge